Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Poem of the Week - Part 7

This one goes out to Miss Mason. She is a classy lady who I am quite fond of. **Note: this is a different Brooke than the post about A Crooked and Babbling Brooke. Here is the story.

Back in the day I met Brooke through a mutual friend. We became friends and I had this thing for her. Here was my problem. She had this other roommate that I also found attractive. So I tried to figure out if I had a chance with either of them. In doing so I was able to alienate both.

I wanted to make out with the other girl because she had that draw. She did something to my loins…I think they yearned for her. Brooke on the other hand, equally attractive, desirable...and a definite yearning, but is the kind of girl you don’t just roll and bone out. You hang onto her because she is smart, classy; she’s got this smile that makes your eyes think they have been resurrected and able to see heavenly things. I can’t get enough of it. I could probably just stare at her face all day. Her eyes are like gold and milk chocolate had a baby. She’s got long dark hair that Pantene commercials brag about.

So there I am…torn. Loins vs. Commitment and Meaning. So it was hard for me to decide what I wanted. You know that old, have your cake and eat it too, adage? Well, I would have liked both and I guess I made that too obvious because as I said, I didn’t get to enjoy either of them.

A lyric comes to mind now as I reflect on that attempt. It is a song called Dirty Mouth, from a Utah band that I really like called The Devil Whale.
“I never made my intentions clear/I held them all in.” I don’t know if I ever did a good job at telling her how I felt. I saw her this past weekend when I visited Utah and I could have slapped myself. I told her I would make my next post about her because I had a poem about her. This poem in its original form ended up on her door one night randomly. I don’t know if I signed it or if she ever got it. So here you go Brooke. So here are my intentions, clearly. I don't know if they have changed all that much. I'd still date her til she loved me or couldn't stand me.

Miss Mason

If you were on the phone
I’d say I’ve been acting dumb
Wanting to be with you
But never being with you
I want to kiss you
I’ve cried because I’ve missed you
Now I think I have lost you
And it’s causing me to pause and see
What you really meant to me
I looked at you and Brooke it’s true
Every time you spoke to me
I wanted to be
The guy that you’d decide
To stand by through hard times
I wanted to be there for you
If you had a bad day at school
I wanted you to call me from the ticket booth
And tell me how your day has been
I wanted to be there
When things were good
And if things went bad
Or if you got mad
I wanted to be there
To make you laugh
So hard you’d cry
And you’d forget why
You were mad in the first place
This is why I’ve been acting strange
This is why I feel insane
And why I say the things I say
I’m secretly, madly in love with you
And you don’t know
And I can’t tell you
I’m scared that you’ll hate me
Not want to see me
Or come near me
So I go on hurting inside
But outside I’m fine

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